“What are you doing?”

I can remember my mom asking me that question. It was usually when things got quiet in the house. I would always reply to her with one simple word, “nothing”. That’s when she knew she’d better find out what my “nothing” was. It was usually something mom wouldn’t like. When I recently spent a month with my daughter and her family, I asked my youngest granddaughter that same question. She also said “nothing”. Even if she had been sleeping or sitting staring out a window, which she doesn’t do because she would fall asleep, she could reply of those things. I told her she was at least “breathing”, and that it isn’t possible to be doing nothing. Sometime later after my return home, my daughter called me to say she had asked her that question. My granddaughters reply to her mom was, “breathing”. Ha, that’s my girl…lol.

But think about it. When I sit and do nothing, I feel guilty. Could I be so conditioned by our society to be busy and to be doing something, that I cannot do nothing without feeling like there is something I need to be doing?! I could be reading today or even take a short nap but when I sit down and look around, it feels like I should be working doing something. Breakfast was cleaned up after, there’s supper to get ready for but it’s too early to prep, I cleaned house already but I still feel guilty about doing nothing.

I’m pretty sure this comes from at least two avenues. First being that with Fibromyalgia and two different Arthritis’ the last thing I want anyone to think of me is that I’m lazy. The other side of that is the belief that I don’t need help and I can do it myself. Second I’ll give to God because I know the devil has a hand in trying to keep me so busy that I forget about Him. I work myself into a flare and then I have to sit down and with that comes a lot of pain, discomfort and even more guilt. It is an endless cycle with only one way out…Lot’s and lots of prayer.

Father, thank You that I can come to You for everything and You promise to provide. Thank You for Your peace and strength.

 

 

 

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About Donna Lynn

I'm a grandma with Fibromyalgia who loves her family and wants to make a difference, even if it is lots of tiny ones. I live in sunny Florida and enjoy my time with family and friends. I'm living with God leading, hoping to someday make some sense of it all. I give Him the glory as much as I can and I love to share Him with everyone.
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